“If it doesn’t open, it’s not your door.”
Several weeks ago, on a late shift working, I closed an always-locked door, and when I returned, said door would not open. I tried and I tried, but nothing was working. The keys were worthless, and the lock and door had already been screaming out their issues.
I needed that door to open because my car keys were on the other side of that door, among other important items. After a half hour of trying on my own, with other folks finding some humor in my dilemma, I called for help.
Help tried from afar to offer ideas, and I tried all the ideas, and the passersby still chuckled. “Only on your shifts,” one said, which did seem to be true.
Finally, my relief arrived, and together she and I worked on the door.
“1, 2, 3…KICK!”
I then found the closest thing to a hammer and we went to town on trying to knock the door handle off so we could at least click the latch and lift and push together. That rubber mallet did a fine job, but once the handle was askew, we quickly discovered this door handle was made for security. Now we had a broken handle and a door covered in rubber mallet scuffs and our footprints.
The door remained in place.
At long last, more help arrived. At the end, four women were kicking this door, pushing, lifting, jiggling the lock, and then one tried the key again and managed it … just … so, and the door opened.
We all shared a laugh and high fives, and eventually, I was able to go home.
I’ve thought about that scene multiple times over these last few weeks, how we talk so much about doors opening and closing, how we talk so much about getting support and help.
That door wouldn’t open, but it was definitely my door to get through. And the others showed up because I asked for help. They didn’t just watch me struggle. They showed up, and they kicked that door in with me.
I know this is a very literal experience that I’m comparing to opportunity and calling/coincidence/destiny or whatever you might call it, but here’s what I’ve learned in life: I’ve spent so much time being reactive that I haven’t often been proactive. That is, yes, I had to react to the door being stuck behind me, but I was proactive in how I got back through that door.
In the same way, I’ve been reactive to opportunities and doors that open easily, doors where someone opens it and invites me through. And that has been beautiful, but now I’m in a season where I am looking for the doors to walk through — or kick down (limiting beliefs and whatnot) — and seize my opportunities.
Sometimes doors need more work than turning the handle or being invited in. Sometimes you have to go find them and do the work to get through them. That sounds hard and a little scary, but I’m not alone in this. I’m surrounded by supportive warriors who will kick down doors with me.
Sometimes it’s really not your door, but you’re not going to know until you go through it.
And then? Spread those wings, baby!
