“I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.”
-Attributed to Mark Twain
A friend reminds me constantly, “All is well.” As a mom, as a wife, as a woman, I have to grab this idea and hold on tightly because life is often too scary and risky to consider the alternative. Because my imagination, it works.
As I go through health issues that remain mysterious, and as I know my eldest will be a bonafide police officer in a few months, and as I have two high school children who are out of my sight 90% of the time, I have to believe all is well. I cannot waste time and lose sleep worrying about what could be happening, what might be wrong, how dangerous that career might be, and on and on.
That doesn’t at all mean I don’t worry nor that I am oblivious to the pains of this world. As I type this, a loved one’s son is fighting to live. As I type this, our community is getting the news that a teenager has died. As I type this, countless hearts are broken and tragedy is striking and parents are losing children and lives are changed for the worse. All is not well for many.
It’s a struggle to keep marching forward sometimes. A real struggle. The pieces of my broken heart weigh me down.
I have to refocus my thoughts when tragedy strikes close to home, or when worry threatens to drown me in pity, or when my own imagination takes me on a trip of dramatic woe. I have to remember what is beautiful, even when the big picture just changed. I have to center myself and pray and remember that all is well, even when all is not well. Because I can’t worry away fear, and I can’t stress away what if. No amount of lost sleep or aimless wandering through the wounded rooms of my heart will change what is or what might be.
When the world feels like it is crumbling down, I have to grasp the hand of God and hold on and let Him whisper to me, “All is well.” And while I might not always buy it, while I might not always be able to convince myself of that thought, it’s what I have. So I hold on, I pray, and I turn if over to the only one who has control.
“So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
-Isaiah 41:10
*Dedicated to my favorite chiropractor.
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Mridu Khullar Relph - I always had an overactive imagination but I’ve discovered that since becoming a parent, I will picture the most horrific brutal acts known to mankind and get myself worked up into a tizzy. It’s fear, nothing else, I know this, and I’m certainly not alone in feeling like this, but I suppose there’s a protective instinct in all of us that needs to shelter those we love more than the rest of the world.
That you worry so much only shows how much you care and cherish what you have. And that is a GOOD THING. I think.